God, AIDS, Africa & HOPE

Reflections / Gedanken

22.08.2009 Saturday blues… and the spirit house

Saturday, in the morning shopping – in the afternoon working. A sermon to prepare, emails to answer, a future to be developed… so much to do and so little time sometimes. A wonderful and sunny day so far – winter in Cape Town can be like summer in Europe – so beautiful and relaxing. It is indeed a gift to live at the end of Africa – such a beautiful spot, unique and full of atmosphere.

And yes, my spirit house has arrived in Cape Town and hopefully customs will be so friendly to release it soonest. A spirit house is a traditional small house mainly used in Thailand. It houses the spirits of a house and one must give eating and drinking and not to forget some joss sticks on important days. Can a priest believe in such things? Well, I can.. 🙂 at least I love that idea of being reminded every day that this world is so much more than we can feel and touch and hear and see…. And believing in the community of living and death, as we do as Christians, why not manifesting this thought in a Thai tradition. The part of my soul which is surely Thai origin is so excited and I am sure, my Buddha statues at home will be happy to be in company of a spirit house. Feels more home for them… 🙂

I am excited and can’t wait to see the spirit house – and hope it will be done as ordered. Otherwise another reason to go back to Thailand..  but I guess, I am never too short of reasons to visit my beloved Thailand. 🙂

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08.08.2009 moving means moving

Moving house, and yesterday finally the last big push to get all stuff from the old flat to the new house. Moving is always an amazing exercise, and the best chance to get rid of all stuff not needed anymore. But I feel after 24 hours in the new house, that moving indeed moves life – different environment, different scenery, different people living next to you – and in Cape Town, a different part of town means really a complete different feel. New chance, new lifestyle, new restaurants, new habits.. good so.

After packing the whole week I am exhausted, but happy to be in my new home. It will keep me busy for  the next days to come, I am sure of that. So, now there is only the last question to answer – the question of my future. I hope that I also find clarity this coming week. Cross my fingers…

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01.08.2009 Home again.. :-)

Coming home again – a great experience… rain, no stairways to leave the plane, being wet until reaching the bus, waiting for the luggage – belt 1… then belt 2 – all in rush to the new belt – new announcement: belt 4 now.. chaos… stop and go on the highway – yeah… back in Cape Town. As I have to move flat next week my first way is to the new home: the house alarm does not stop after de-activation, from every corner there is the sound of a beep… waiting for the technician – well, it could be… hours later… all fixed, but unfortunately the transformator blown – so no alarm, until tomorrow..  OK… Saturday comes, technicians comes, after 2 hours it seems not so much to be the transformer, but the cables, under the pavement – so no way to repair, and anyhow, shops are closed to get new cable…  Welcome to South Africa… Phoning ADT, the security company to get relief – but my new landlord is still contracted – and she is gone – off to Australia…. Without written consent, the ADT manager explains impatiently, there is nothing ADT can do for me… well, she admits Australia is far, but that is not her problem, she has her rules…  Did I mention that I love the way, South Africans working?? 🙂

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24.07.2009 one week to go…

When holidays start, then it seems like quite some time – but suddenly, after having done two/third, time seems to run faster and faster…  And one suddenly must make a plan to do all the things still open on ones agenda. Well, this time it isn’t different – and suddenly the realisation, that next week this time, I will already be back in Cape Town, most probably struggling with jet leg and an office full of requests and notes and mails and so on…

What makes this coming home so special is the fact, that with the day I start working again, my last 8 weeks as the chaplain to the German speaking Catholic Community will commence  (if all is going according to plan).  Without knowing exactly until now what will be my next “stage” in life, I have to move from one place to another within Cape Town, I have to wind down all the technicalities which such a hand over requires – and South Africa can be a nightmare in this concern. 12,5 years of service going towards an end.

I feel a bit like Abraham going towards the unknown;  with the difference, that he was much older, and he was called out, not kicked or pushed out – so to speak.  🙂 I am sure I will reflect quite a bit what it meant to me being a chaplain to that very special community in Cape Town – not to forget the folks in Durban. All so special and come what may come, I am aware that it was indeed a privilege to serve those communities the last years.

I always said when we had visitors: “What can be more nice than to be a chaplain in Cape Town?”

Having reflected on it a bit during my holidays I am aware that Cape Town changed me a lot. Living in Africa, living next to Table Mountain, living in vivid history happening in the country in the moment – having such a diverse crowd of faithful from all corners of German speaking parts of the world and quite a lot already distant from the institution “church”, it made me realise that whatever we think we know exactly can quick fade away as I had to learn every day that life is more colourful, more diverse, more exciting, more different than I ever thought.

This diversity, the colourful mixture of God’s brothers and sisters has sometimes an intensity, which definitely you hardly will find back home in parishes in Germany, Austria, Switzerland or all the other places. And adding all the experience through our social project “Hope Cape Town”, the mixture of guests at our Mediterranean Villa – sometimes it could get even for me a bit too much and too hectic…

And then still remains the question: How do you bring this “all” home to Germany? How do explain those on the purely administrative level that such diversity requires sometimes solutions beside “the norm”? How do you open up their hearts and minds that indeed church has to be diverse too – and has been and will always be.  Not that easy….

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07.07.2009 Questions…

During the last 8 years working closely with people being infected and affected, one starts thinking what all this is fitting in in our faith system. Is HIV or AIDS only to be seen as a medical condition? Or as a social or moral failure to bring people towards a proper behaviour – what ever that might mean? In the beginning of the AIDS pandemic, I heard from some church leaders that HIV and AIDS are punishment for bad behaviour.. Or is the virus simple another sign of evolution – the daily struggle of nature to survive?

Are there indeed the “poor AIDS babies” and the adults “who are somehow bearing the stigma of misbehaving”?  Are there good or bad people living with the virus?

What does it mean to our theology of creation, our picture of God? What does it mean to the moral teaching of my Roman-Catholic church? Are we able to develop a theology of AIDS and turning the stigma into a charisma?

What does work in this field do with a priest, thorn apart between dogma, teaching and real life situations. The church is mater and magister, so told me a bishop last year in Rome. “Where I am working, we represent more the magisterium, where you working, you represent more the mother” Rightly said, but what does it mean in consequence?

I don’t have answers – but I am on a journey to find out..

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