God, AIDS, Africa & HOPE

Reflections / Gedanken

10/08/2009 • 9:12 am Comments Off on 08.10.2009 secret gag order?

08.10.2009 secret gag order?

Since I took up my post as Fidei Donum priest in the Archdiocese of Cape Town, I am asked again and again what secret deal I have made, what kind of restrictions are lying on me to be able to work in the fields of HIV and AIDS for the church. And seems that people doubt it when I say, that there has been no burden laid on me in any form. The frame of my work constitutes our faith, which means that we have to proclaim that everybody is loved by God and that this love is unconditional. The frame is marked by the message of Jesus, that we are all brothers and sisters and that we have to care for each other. The frame is set by the spirit of God, his good spirit allowing all men and women to achieve full potential of their lives if it is not messed up by the fellow brothers and sisters. The framework consists of the message of justice for all, peace for all and an environment, which will keep a future for our kids and the kids of the kids.

I never doubted or lost that framework, and that is why I believe that it must be possible to talk to each other without any anxiety, to meet each other, to listen to each other. I will always be concerned if man of the cloth or employees of the church don’t meet this basic rule. I suspect, that if there is anxiety to speak to one another, there is a lack of experience of God’s unconditional love.
Nevertheless, in the framework of our faith I am working now in the new portfolio and I have no intention to change that frame. I believe that religion and faith has much power to give to the people, lots of strength, and hope and believe in a good future. And all this I want to take to those here in South Africa, who are stigmatized thought the pandemic and this little virus called HI virus.

Lets see how it all develops…

Filed under: HOPE Cape Town Association & Trust, Networking, Reflection, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

08/06/2009 • 4:06 pm Comments Off on 06.08.2009 amazing and difficult

06.08.2009 amazing and difficult

Sometimes looking up the lists of sponsors and donors or reading through emails I am amazed to read and sense how much people, whom I  never have seen in person, are close and well connected to my own life and work.  The work in the fields of HIV and AIDS, the somehow upstream battle with being able to hold on your own conviction in your own church, it leaves one often exhausted and down. But then, somehow and from somewhere, an uplifting email arrives, a much needed donation is done, an to me unknown person dedicates times and thoughts to be with me in spirit and thoughts.

For me, this is the most amazing part of working with HOPE Cape Town and advocating a measured and meaningful response to the pandemic. Even if the conflict potential within the church sometimes brings me down, there is always a light coming from somewhere. Be it a person, I am dealing with in my work, be it a totally stranger from the other end of the world.

For me, this is the miracle of life and the most amazing experience I have made in the last years. And the warm feeling it creates is worth all the pain and suffering while trying to develop a way in the minefield of HIV and AIDS and all the moral implications, when some of our church leaders are to afraid to tackle them.
It is so endless difficult to have my voice heard in my own church and to be respected for what I am going through and experiencing while doing this work. It is breathtaking how fast one is corned and in effect put in a corner and labeled and sidelined from individuals within the church, who think that their own limited (office) experience represent the whole world.

But once again reading through the encouraging emails, listening to voices of strangers on the phone just wanting to say their appreciation of what you are doing – they are like angels and they do more for the good course than they can ever imagine.

Filed under: HOPE Cape Town Association & Trust, Reflection, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

08/03/2009 • 1:41 pm Comments Off on 03.08.2009 positive blogging…

03.08.2009 positive blogging…

It is amazing to find out more and more people blogging about their positive lifestyles and it is encouraging to read about it.  Most of them are doing it anonymously and it is understandable amidst the fear of stigmatisation and the often neurotic way, people react to a positive person. Why is that so? Because amazingly I have the impression, that it is always the others, who would be vulnerable to catch the virus. I have had discussions with people having multiple unprotected sex, but they were still convinced that they carefully selected their partners and that the risk of contracting the virus was almost zero. Isn’t that amazing?
An unforgettable moment in my life was last year visiting a friend in Thailand, who obviously was quite sick when I arrived. Knowing his lifestyle I spend days to convince him to visit a clinic and to let him test himself. On a Saturday evening at 10pm I got him into Silom community clinic and pushed my way with him through the staff trying to close down. Three rapid tests confirmed my suspicion and reflecting with him on what was happening, it was amazing for me to understand that he – deep inside himself – knew, what was wrong with him, but simply refused to face the reality of a test. God knows alone how many infections could have been avoided if he would have gone earlier. But the fear of stigma, of getting sick, of being rejected prevented him for a long time to go for the test. Understandable, but it showed me again how stigma adds to more infections and to early death as one starts treatment consequently sometimes too late.

Making things worse in this case, his CD 4 count was still to high to be able to receive treatment (over 200 copies p/ml).. so he had to wait another half a year before being able to start treatment.  These are the things driving me in my work in this field. The stigma, the unnecessary suffering until being eligible for treatment in a 3rd world setting and more and more the restriction of travel for people living with the virus. We are so advanced in treatment in Europe – but we are still miles away from treating HIV as a condition which does not need to end in discrimination or stigmatization of some kind.

We have to work with those affected and infected in an intensive way to change these settings, which lead at the end to more suffering and more infections – completely unnecessary. And we have to work constantly with ourselves to understand our own perceptions, fears, prejudices to convert them into a loving understanding without judgment.

Filed under: General, HIV and AIDS, Reflection, , , , , , , , , ,

07/30/2009 • 6:53 pm Comments Off on 31.07.2009 Why is HIV such a dangerous topic in the church?

31.07.2009 Why is HIV such a dangerous topic in the church?

While reflecting the last weeks on my way and my work with the German speaking Catholic Community and the HOPE Cape Town project, I once again asked myself, why HIV is such a contaminated topic in our RC church?

It is amazing because on the practical side, my church and the churches generally are doing marvellous work and without their engagement, much more suffering would occur. But as soon as you leave the known path of caring for the sick and the dying, a moral minefield seems to open up and at the end, one either shuts up and keeps silent or one has to face the consequences of jeopardizing ones career. It seems to me, that the topic of sexuality is still one of the most difficult topics to discuss in our church, as the church regards itself as the guardian of moral and good behaviour. And here a pandemic kills people of all ages and is connected with the most intimate part of human life: his or her sexuality.

It would be wrong to say that church has not moved in its views about certain aspects of sexuality in the last centuries, but all the developments in this field were done in slow movements. And there was always a lot of anxiety not to let go the higher moral grounds. Seeing the suffering of people every day, it sometimes is very difficult for me as a priest to reconcile the theory of moral teaching with the realities on the ground.  Sometimes I even ask myself, how one ever can bridge the gap between the two. But on the other hand: Should any teaching of the church not assist people to more life, to more happiness, to more joy, to more fulfillment?

At least what I would wish for is that we are able to discuss without fear all options and possibilities to combat this pandemic in all openness and seriousness. Without being put in one corner or the other – it seems to me, that one can only be a fanatic for or against the famous condom – but there is so much more we have to discuss and explore. A serious debate, that I wish for in the month and years to come, to find ways serving human mankind in the most beneficial and realistic way. And I am looking for a theology of HIV and AIDS, integrating the pandemic and finding ways to turn the stigma of HIV and AIDS into a charisma. Too much asked?

Filed under: HIV and AIDS, HOPE Cape Town Association & Trust, Reflection, , , , , , , , , , , , ,

07/20/2009 • 4:54 pm Comments Off on 20.07.2009 Priorities or do I miss out something??

20.07.2009 Priorities or do I miss out something??

Reading about the trillions being suddenly invested in big companies and the economic sector – it seems there is no problem to print the money and “stabilize” the economics and bring it out of recession.
Millions of people dying every day, because the lack of food, the lack of clean water, the lack of medical attention.. and we have to “battle” for every dollar.

And now the first banks report great earnings, big bonus will be paid out again.. business as usual is launching again….  Nothing learned? No nothing really learned! We covered the wounds but avoided the operation..
Human mankind can sometimes be a real” disgrace” for being a son or daughter of God.

Can somebody tell me who’s priorities are wrong??
Or maybe it is, because those in politics and economics, who have been part of the problem, are indeed part of the solution again, which means in consequence, that they will become part of the problem again. You can call it the “circle of life”.

Filed under: General, Reflection, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

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