God, AIDS, Africa & HOPE

Reflections / Gedanken

18.08.2009 Getting better…

Getting better is not that easy, and it comes in small little steps forward like in real life. H1N1 is only reluctantly leaving the body. More days to stay home, read a book, sleep a lot and gain more energy. In South Africa, the 6th person now officially died of swine flu – but statistics here are somehow to take with a pinch of salt. Most tests are done only when people are dead…

Amazingly young people die of the disease – and in the townships there are funny stories about how to prevent the flu. I spoke with a black guy yesterday and he told me, that his doctor told him not to eat any meat – the only way to prevent catching the flu. And if you get it, you die within 9 months. A lot of information for the broader public is still needed and the price for a testing should come down. 700 Rand for a testing which takes 5 days to get a result – this is ridiculous and does not help – the patients are either better or death…

Well, for me, it was an experience and I try now to gain weight again. Next Sunday is coming and I want to be  present in church again.

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17.08.2009 time is running…

6 weeks to go in my old “job” – and still no decision taken about a new portfolio.
“Survived” the H1N1 flu and on the way to recovery.. will take some time…

So life is flowing slowly along with lots of coughing and sneezing. But it is also nice to have some rest, sitting in front of the fireplace and just relaxing and let my thoughts go where ever they want to go. I cannot remember when the last time I took a real time out from work to spend a whole day at home. Amazing… and good.

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15.08.2009 recovery

It is amazing when you suddenly realises again who you are and what you are doing..hehehehe..  🙂  surviving of the swine flu..  🙂 Coughing and feeling awfully lazy reminding you that the way to recovery is still a long one – up to six weeks until on the height of life again.. well, at least I am not infectious anymore when I will start slowly working again, which is scheduled for Wednesday.

So I spend my day relaxing, reading, taking a nap, enjoying my nice new fire place and the sound of wood burning down nicely – what a treat, just interrupted from cascades of coughing and sneezing.. Well, also paradise is not perfect.. I guess…. or it might depend on which paradise… the Christian one, or the Muslim one, or rebirth and nirvana as an alternative option?? Not sure, sometimes I feel tempted to keep all options open.. and to decide when I get there.. Hopefully I will have a chance.. 🙂

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14.08.2009 swine flu or whatever…

It came within an hour – and after loosing 8 kg in2 days and nights it was time to see the doctor.. the flu had arrived – the real one, the one with the piggy name.. – somehow nicely imported from SE Asia I guess. It is indeed a strange feeling laying without movement in your own sweat and being scared to stand up or walk or even move.  Tamiflu and 36 hours of hospital stay with drips and drops and all that stuff  gave me at least my life back – at least in the form of being able to eat and drink again, realising, what is going on around me – and surely some days off to recover from that experience. Not a nice one, but it showed me once again, how fast life can turn around and from conquering the world you are squeezed into a little something happy to breathe… therefore just a brief entry.. bed is calling.  🙂 recovery time….

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09.08.2009 Sunday blues…and toughts about the sermon…

Sunday morning – and the usual ritual. Going to the office, last preparation for the church service and then off we go. And as every Sunday the question before: Does my sermon meets what the people need to hear…? Need to hear to go home afterward more joyful, more thoughtful, with more sun and love and compassion in their hearts? Am I able to touch their hearts and minds – those of the adults, but also those of the kiddies, the young and the old ones?

When I do prepare for a sermon, I always have somebody in front of my mind, or a situation close to my heart. Theological lectures are for study purposes, a sermon should bear witness from my faith, my thoughts, my questions, my experience with the unconditional love. I strongly believe that I can only touch peoples lives when they sense that my words are matched by my life experience. Otherwise I only deliver bloodless words…

Getting feedback on my sermons is very important to me. When I hear that a family was still discussing the sermon on the way back home, or somebody after quite a while can still tell me what I said on that occasion.. it is amazing for me and I feel blessed being able to be a blessing for others. Or an encouragement. Or a stone to stumble and get into deeper thoughts about life and faith.

Whatever it is, a sermon, even if nobody is able or willing to respond directly, must be a dialogue of hearts, otherwise it is a waste of time. Lets hope for this dialogue this morning again.

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